Unlike Anything Before
by Michelle Pruitt
Summary: Hermione is stuck working in Malfoy manor as a maid after the war has left her with nothing. Oneshot. DHr. Postwar, postHogwarts


(A/N): Hello!! The following oneshot is written from Hermione's perspective, and it is after the war and Hogwarts. Reviews are appreciated, and criticism as well if it is constructive. If you like this, you might like my fic Betrayal. It's also a D/Hr. Anyways, I hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think!

P.S.-Sorry to the Betrayal readers who are patiently waiting on chapter 13, it's coming, I promise!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. If I did, Draco and Hermione would be together!!

Unlike Anything Before

His eyes were unlike anything I had ever seen before. They were as pale and icy as the frigid conditions of his soul and housed the fury of a sea after a storm. Their depths told of stories and wisdom beyond my understanding, speaking of dreadful experiences that I would never know. Those beautiful, terrible eyes followed me as I cleaned his house, full of puzzling emotions that I had no success at deciphering. Those eyes had followed me numerous times throughout our years together, watching my every move. A slight blush crept into my face at the intensity of his gaze. I knew what he was thinking.

I knew all of him, and he knew all of me. All of me was his, it always had been. I had never wanted anyone else. His misunderstood disposition and fascinating eyes were enough for me. It didn't matter how much I got trampled on in the end, or how I would feel when I was thrown away. All I wanted was to be with him, despite what that entailed in the end. I couldn't think about anything else, especially not consequences. Thoughts of my future fled as quickly as they had the night that I made that fateful decision, the night that changed everything. The night I learned what love truly was, the night that turned my world upside down.

I mustered all of the bravery in my system, and raised my gaze to meet his. I drowned in their sweet color, memories flooding back to me like a hurricane of emotion. My breathing quickened as I remembered the way those eyes had looked that night, piercing and sweltering, full of passion and lust. In his eyes, in those pools of insanity, I saw the infinite amount of forbidden love just beyond his everyday barriers. Hidden from everyone else, his reserve of thoughts and emotions that he showed only to me came through as clearly as they had that night. I saw in him the most love I had ever known, and I knew that I could never be happy anywhere else.

I opened my mouth to say something, anything. I wanted to tell him that I loved him, more than I had ever loved my family or my friends. More than good, more than evil… I wanted him to know that he was my world. But somehow, the words didn't come, and my thoughts that had seemed so real died away on the tip of my tongue as if they had never existed. I could never tell him. I knew that now, my job wouldn't allow it.

Maybe if the war had ended differently, our relationship could be real. Maybe if Harry Potter hadn't been slaughtered by Voldemort, maybe if the world wasn't overrun by evil and corruption. Maybe if I had been able to live up to my potential as the brightest witch of my age. Instead, I was cleaning houses just to scrape a living. Maybe if things had turned out the way they were supposed to, we could be together in the end.

But that was too much to hope for, too much for a mere maid.

He saw the doubt in my eyes, and within seconds he was by my side. His arms were around me again, and all my fears and doubts melted away like wax off of a candle. I feel his heart beating next to mine and drink in the sound, realizing that in precious few seconds he will be gone again. I didn't care if it was fake, I didn't care if he didn't mean it. I even didn't care if he was only using me, I needed him like a newborn needs its mother. I had to tell him, I would tell him. He deserved to know my feelings, however detrimental to my job they might be.

"Listen, um..." I started, trying to find the right words to say.

Suddenly a female voice broke through from the front door. "Honey, I'm home!!" Pansy called.

He tore apart from me, the sudden distance between us caused me to feel a pain that was so deep it seemed physical. Perfect moments between us were always too good to last for very long. He went to her, took her in her arms and smiled at her. I felt nauseous seeing them together like this, seeing him hold her the way he once held me. She smiled back, a bright smile, with more love than a mere servant like me could ever give. Her smile grew brighter as she drew his hand to her stomach, asking him, "Did you feel him kick? He knows his daddy! We'll raise a pureblood to make even Lucius proud."

I cringe in disbelief. I knew that it would end, and yet somehow that made it that much harder to face. I couldn't see them together, it hurt too much. It felt like daggers flying in and out of my chest, ripping out all of my tears and spilling them on the thirsty ground for the whole world to see. She is greeting me now, completely oblivious to the discomfort on my face. I greet her and try to smile back, but I can't give her the smile that she expects. _Do you realize how lucky you are?_ I can't help thinking. _I could have been in your place so easily. Never take him for granted. Never throw him away. Do it for me, the girl he turned away._

I turn around and head into the kitchen, unable to watch the scene before me any longer. Reality cuts through me like a knife, and I realize that all of my feelings towards this man are going to have to be pushed aside. He is happy with her, and she is happy with him. No matter how much I love him, I have no right to take that away.

I hold my own stomach, and feel the life inside rustle around and awaken. It is his, but he does not know.

I see the perfect, beautiful expression on his face as he dreams of his future with his child, and I know that I can't crush that hope.

He will never know.


End file.
